"ALMOST GOT ME"

J. Chapman

You almost have my mind, and soon after, you will feel my soul

And from then on out, WE will have JOINT control

Once you have my mind, next will be my heart

And there will be nothing that could ever tear us apart

So for now Ill be

Hypnotized thats all I can say

Its how my mind feels at the end of each day

Mesmerized that is the only way to feel

Knowing that you are being nothing but real

Stolen thats what you have done to my heart

I cannot endure the excitement of waiting for this thing to start

Confident I know that we will go somewhere

If we let our minds go to places we would not dare

Reassured I know that things will be fine

I know that we could live, a life so divine

Eternally that is how long you will be mine

Because our relationship will surpass the test of time

Patientsit is the only key

To unlock a future of just you and me

"UNTITLED"
J. Chapman

I came home late last night

I knew he was gonna be mad

Maybe if I sneak in the kids room

He wont go off cause of the fun I had

Its okay, he didnt mean it

The bruise will go away

He didnt mean it, he just got excited

Really, just give it a couple days

Tonight I was only 5 minutes late

Maybe he wont be upset

I brought him home a gift tonight

Maybe in the morning he will forget

The kids are off at school

I can say I fell down the stairs

He didnt mean to push me

I should have called, he says he was scared

Today he said not to go out

And once again, I forgot

Hes cursing me and screaming

Stopping him I cannot

I didnt want the kids

To see me laid out

I hope the caskets closed

I thought the abuse was what love was about

Well last night no one came home

The house was quiet and still

Because of THIS poem hes locked up

I left everything to the kids in my will

Dont ever let a man hit you

Dont let him make you cry

Dont believe that it was your fault

Because slowly, it will make you die

"IT TAKES TWO"
J. Chapman

From short hair to long hair

Pixies to micro braids

Im changing like the weather

Im changing like the days

I use to be a B cup

Now I believe Im a C

My waist is now a 12

My old clothes dont fit me

From 120 to 135

15lbs in just 4 weeks

My breast are getting heavy

Im getting stretch marks and fat cheeks

I cant keep my food down

But I eat everything in site

My period hasnt come in 3 months

I know something just aint right

My moods change so fast

More times than I can blink my eyes

Dont try to leave now

The blood tests never lie

Were stuck in this together

In 18yrs it can end

What happened to the man

You claimed you were back then

Using protection here and there

Left US with a child

And you better stick around

Even if you have to walk a mile

No one forced this on US

WE knew what we needed to do

Theres nowhere to throw the blame

To have a baby, it takes TWO

"A NEW LIFE"
J. Chapman

I write no longer of sexual pleasures, of intimacy I should know not

I write no longer of hatred, the wrongs against me I have forgave and I forgot

Because the sins committed out of wedlock, give me no pride

I think nothing of them, but from the shame I cannot hide

I will however write of the greatness I will see,

When I wake one glorious morning, and see the Lord smiling at me

Ill write of the life brand new that will start when I am born again

And of the changes and the blessings, for my sinning will have to end

For worldly things are priceless, and they will only be left behind

Ill try to write of valuables, things that will stimulate your mind

Ill dig deep into my soul, and try to explain how it will feel

To be with my heavenly father, who is nothing less than real

Someday Ill tell you the struggle, of how I tried to be like everyone

And Ill tell you how things became harder, once my new life begun

And hopefully in your dreams, I tell you how worth it, it actually was

To give my life Christ, and experience everlasting love.

"S.B.M."
J. Chapman

Body carved from clay, baked to a golden brown

Black men from creation, never to be put down

Symbolizing strength and development of our nation

Beat, bruised and killed, to enable a strong foundation

Muscular and cut, articulate from head to toe

Bound to make a statement, and let people know

How he thrived to produce seeds, to replenish the crops

Which the "man" beat down and tried to stop

But never letting the past hold him back

And for his Nubian Queen he picks up the slack

Arms so tight, skin stretched and smooth

Hands worked hard, but gentle enough to soothe

Chest so defined, precise and strong

There for her head to lay, all night long

From his thighs to his calves, legs meant to run

Perserverance and patients, to get the "job" done

Mentality to handle all that God says he can bear

Heart hard but soft, just enough to show he cares

Created from dirt derived to be great

Creation of a being that was all but a mistake.

"S.B.W."
J. Chapman

Body built of faith, the ultimate power

No man need be with her; Gods her strong tower

Elegance and beauty, in every stride she takes

Helping others around her, learning from ancestral mistakes

Soul built for enduring; surviving all pain

Setting precedents for others, never again shall she be chained

Eyes bright and shining, aware of whats around

Willing to do whatever, always standing her ground

Never holding back, speaking through thick and full lips

Men keeping their eyes locked as they are mesmerized by her hips

Legs long and slim, given strength to withstand

The heartache and pain endured from day one on this land

Helping the brothas still, to build dreams in this nation

From slavery to freedom, she was Gods greatest creation

Able to bear fruit, unlike no other

Not only part founder of this nation but also part mother

If you look into her heart, youll find its solid as gold

And youll see she has a spirit that strong black women behold.

"AND YOU ARE"
J. Chapman

 You caught be by surprise, like a warm winter breeze

Your casual and unique style, had me weak at the knees

You were shy at first but then showed your true colors

And I gained feelings for you, unlike no other

You wanted to be the silent type, not heard by anyone

But yet you want to bring people out like the hot summer sun

And I was one, who came out in your light

Me powder blue, and you, a simplistic white

Cool clam and collective, your head on straight

And I feel I must grab on, before it gets to late

Before you are out of reach, and before youre out of grasp

Stay sweet, and cool, stay real and true

Dont stray too far; I never want to lose you

"MAYBE NO MORE THAN FRIENDS"
J. Chapman

Have I ever told you, how much I REALLY care?

And how I know I can always, count on you being there

And how every time we talk, my heart is filled with joy

And how Im so very glad, that for this long, youve been my boy

I remember way back, when we were little tykes

Going to the same schools, taking that same hike

We would walk all the way home, although almost never together

And we sat in the same classes. And would joke and talk forever

As the years passed us by, we both quickly matured

Our personalities began to vary, and our self-esteem was re-assured

And now even though we are apart, and dont see each other every day

I still REALLY care, and have no doubt that best friends is what well stay

Through all these yearsas the roads began to get rough

You always kept it real, and that has always been enough

When no one else understood, I could always count on you

I always knew if no one else would, YOU would always come through

Now youre like my brother, even though at times I wanted more

And as I watched you progressed, my heart slowly tore.

But I began to realize, what we were meant to be

Which so no more than friends, and thats okay with me

So I wish you good luck, with all your female friends

And hope that one day youll find a love, which will stay true until the end

But always know deep down, that regardless of a him or her,

Whatever goes down, Ill always be in your corner.

"I LOVE YOU"
J. Chapman

Your lips I secretly desire to touch

Your arms around my body, I do enjoy much

Your sexy voice, I long to hear

Your entire body I want near

Your comforting smile, I yearn to see

Your toned body here next to me

The masculine touch so divine

That sends chills up and down my spine

The good night sleeps after your call

The way you put me above all

The time that you want to spend

Taking the next step and no longer being just friends

The thought of us sharing our life

You being my husband and I being your wife

The thought of having a future together

And knowing that you could be with me forever

Makes me want to say three words

That are often said, but never really heard

The words that are shared, and are very special between two

Those three simple words, I LOVE YOU!

"TOGETHER AGAIN"
J. Chapman

We have been through good times, hard times, and even some bad, but I have learned ot appreciate all the times we had

Through heartache and pain, through arguments and fights, through love and emotions, I want to make things right

I love you like no other, my feelings for you are strong, and being on this earth with out you, I feel like I cant go on

Of course I can live a life all to my self, but you are like a medicine that heals me when I have bad health

You brightened up my days, given my strength and courage through the night. You help me spread my wings and through love takes a flight.

You taught me how not to be selfish, and think about others that I meet, you lifted my spirits when they were down and set me back on my feet

In all these words I send to you, I cant find anything to say that barely expresses my love for you that grows each and every day.

I wish that we could be together once again, and spend life eternally with a love will never end.

"ABANDONED"
J. Chapman

You left me at a tender young age

Not quite prepared to walk across lifes stage

Not ready to perform any of my acts

To the crowds of Hispanics, Orientals, white or blacks

But I still walked out, alone and in fear

But deep in my heart, I always kept you near

Upset with how things were going I decided to change my ways

With hopes of meeting you again some day

Through the heart ache from mom, and the disappointment from my brother

To the decision of being alone, after you I looked to no other

Wondering about how life would be outside this world

My body growing and changing, no longer a little girl

Trying new things, new people to meet

Dying to grow up, rip and run in the streets

From sex to alcohol, experiencing life

Learning too early of heartbreak, physical and mental strife

Not knowing where to turn, or which way to run

Thinking of dating a pharmacist, matter of fact, I think Im in love with one

As if I am a burden, I feel depressed and let down

There are always issues when it comes to me, so maybe I wont stay around

From the petty arguments with grown people to the worries of family

To the hatred in my heart that I will always carry with me

Shutting everyone out, not letting a single soul in

Giving up on hopes of joy, waiting for things to end

Constant pressure built up, not knowing what to do

And constantly confused because I dont have you

Looking to other fathers, maybe there Ill find love

Putting the few good times I have, aside and trying to be with you above

Not leading a great life, not too many role models

Instead of heart being full, its empty and hollow

Often thinking of ways to end all this pain

No consideration for others, bit not wanting to dishonor your name

But as they tell me, your seed, I will one day be like you

I begin to do my best and with myself stay true




"THE END IS NEAR"
J. Chapman

Every so often, youll let go of a hand,

Someone else has to leave this land.

You dont always have an answer and dont always know why,

But it is the cycle of life, when He calls, we must reply.

You cry, you scream, you tremble with fear,

But it is just a sign that the end is near.

As an elementary school child, you live a care free life,

Then you lose a parent and learn to early, the meaning of strife.

So you fear every move, are scare of every relationship,

And you could never prepare better next time, never be more equipped.

So you cry, you scream, you tremble with fear,

But it is just a sign that the end is near .

Befriending others in the middle school halls,

And suddenly you find that the good Lord has called,

Another one of you friends to be with him in the air.

You are lonely and feel pain because they are no longer there.

Again you cry, you scream, you tremble with fear,

But it is just a sign that the end is near.

In high school you are mature, you can handle things well,

But once again from your grasp, another hand has fell.

You cant take it, not again, yet you feel to big to cry.

Yet, it is too overwhelming to hear that someone else had to die.

So you cry, you scream, you tremble with fear,

But it is just a sign that the end is near.

In life I made connections, and had to watch many fall.

I try to believe its okay, theres a time for us all.

So I cried and I screamed, and I trembled with fear,

And I remembered that this too shall pass, the end times are just near.